Connecting the Flow-State of Our Big Vision ~ Episode 103 ~ My Conversation with Kath Clarke

Heart of Connection Podcast
Heart of Connection Podcast
Connecting the Flow-State of Our Big Vision ~ Episode 103 ~ My Conversation with Kath Clarke

Connecting the Flow-State of Our Big Vision

Mark [0:00] I’d like to welcome Kath Clarke The Digital Traffic Chick to the World Heart of Connection podcast. I’m your host Mark Randall. Kath is a magic finder and re-connector in the guise of digital marketing. And her goal is reconnecting people back to their big vision within and to express that vision out there. I would imagine, welcome Kath.

Kath [0:22] Thank you so much for having me, Mark. Facebook link.

Mark [0:24] Kath ~ thank you for being a guest. How do we ~ as a re-connecter, how do you do it? What’s your process to help people reconnect to their big vision? How do you connect to it in yourself? Where do you want to start?

Connecting People to their Inner Magic

Kath [0:46] Yeah, okay. So, I think that through connecting other people to theirs, I love that place. That space, it’s so juicy and it feels like a real creative free for all in that space. And, I kind of laugh that I get paid to do it, to be honest (Laughter). But I guess what I’m doing in – its interesting people come to me thinking that they’re one way or another, or there’s something. I’m a hypnotherapist, I’m a real estate agent, they’re so busy putting on hats and putting themselves inboxes. And I find that even when I’m working with other people that will probably say that they work in the same field as me, like brand strategy, or marketing strategy, or business strategy, even. They seem even those people that are coaching these, small business owners or consultants through this space of sort of deciding how to put themselves out there, Like, who am I? What’s my point of difference? How do I, how am I different to everybody else. And even those people that are coaching, those people don’t often realise, and maybe I shouldn’t give the secret away, how truly easy it is to get somebody to make a decision and stick with it. And really go for it and make their impact? So, I guess, how do I do it? Honestly, I play games with them, and not in the kind of nasty, scary way. But I make them follow a series of sort of meditations and, I call it the – finish the sentences game. And the idea is actually just to get them out of their heads because they’re so busy putting themselves in a box and reconnect them back to what they actually – where their magic is and what it actually is.

Connecting People with their Hearts

Mark [2:34] I just want to pick up on that beautiful word, did you just said ~ get them out of their heads, I assume by saying that you’re getting them out of their heads and into their hearts

Kath [2:45] Oh, totally absolutely. There’s – I feel like, you know, we could go deep on all of this. But I mean, I feel like obviously, we’re all put here with some, – is it our purpose? Or is it what we’re kind of born to do.  I don’t know if it’s all of that, or if it’s just our truest form of us, which is this creative flow.  I can feel it because we’re in Melbourne and in lockdown and have been for about eight months now. And as a result of that, I’ve pivoted my business in a few different directions. And I’m back doing some things that aren’t in my flow. Like sitting behind a computer in marketing, mapping out lead funnels and things like that. But when I’m in front of people, and I’m presenting or when I’m working with someone one-on-one in one of my strategy days, it is so much simpler in that space. Where I’m just reading their energy and reading their heart and everything that they want to do and be and bring to fruition. And it puts me in that space at the same time. So, it’s like we enter this space together, and they’re wowed by it. Like they, there are just going Oh My God how did you know, and I’m saying crazy stuff to them. Like, do you know what you represent to me – is like sort of a wild woman, of wolfing through the woods with this kind of hood on.  And like it is magical, kind of mysterious. And they’re just sitting there just going, oh, my God. And then we turn that into a business, right? It’s kind of bonkers. And I just I legit don’t know how I make money out of it. It’s just to me, it just seems so natural and simple. And that I think that’s the thing when you’re working in your heart space, it’s not hard. It’s just easy.

Connecting to Our Flow-State

Mark [4:27] Tell me about the flow-state that you just mentioned flow and the connection to flow. What’s that experience like for yourself as you’re connecting to yourself? And you’re in flow?

Kath [4:39] Yeah, I love that feeling. So, as soon as you start talking about it, my whole body starts to tingle. So, and I can start to feel this kind of space open up at the top of my head and I start to connect up to whatever’s – up their universe, Mother Nature, whatever you want to call it. And to me it’s like, of course, all of that sitting there all the time. But it’s just that moment of permission to let it in.  And it is quite funny that that suns decided to position itself right there now (Laughter). Again, it’s a tingly feeling it’s, for me, it’s a tingly feeling in a rush through my body.  And shall I go there Mark, I will go there. It’s the same – it’s the same sort of feeling I get when I orgasm. But in a different part of my body, basically. It’s that it’s just like a kind of thing.

Mark [5:35] Totally get that. How do you work at doing it for yourself? How does Kath connect to herself? Do you have a process? A daily process, etc, etc.

Connecting to My Affirmations

Kath [5:50] I’m not that well behaved. I don’t do it daily. I’m a bit of a – I’m sure I’m very much like many people. Where it’s like, ideally, I’d be doing it daily. But I have a little – I’ve got an energy coach and I have a little rhythm of sort of, I guess you’d call it an affirmation or something like that – that I go through. Sorry, that lighting is a bit terrible now. And, so I sort of, I do take time. To start with, it had to – it was practically right. But now I can almost just think of it and it sort of starts to come. So, it’s not as hard anymore, but then at that sort of breeds a little bit of complacency to be honest.

Mark [6:27] When you think about it, could that be described as a cellular memory of it?

Connecting & Pivoting through Being Stuck

Kath [6:34] I reckon it is.  Because it happens so quickly. Like it’s such a rush, that it has to be. I’ve never actually thought about that. But I think it would have to be. When I first sort of even started to connect with myself at all, to be honest, which was in about 2016. When I was just absolutely fed up with feeling stuck in life and feeling stuck in my relationship. Stuck in how I was making money, all of that sort of thing. And I just, you know, there’s weird funny little things that happened and it’s precipitous. And one thing leads to the next and the synchronicity and everything like that.  And it was all energy base because I remember I was house-sitting a friend of mines house. And she’s a defence lawyer. And don’t tell her, but I started wearing her clothes and walking around the house like I could afford the mortgage on the joint. And then one thing led to another. This weird situation, it just seems too long a story to go into. But I ended up at this event as a result of all of this. And I met my sales coach. And then my sales coach just said, basically grow some balls, and let’s, start putting yourself out there. And so, I did and then but of course, as soon as I started putting myself out there, I started getting back. And then – it was so bizarre – the first day I picked up the phone to make a sales call. And I made like seven and a half grand. And before that, I’d only made like, 45 grand a year. So, there was one phone call, and then it all started. And that’s what led me to my sales career to my energy coach rather, and it’s all this thing, but it’s funny. I don’t know what it feels like for a lot of your work. When you’re growing and working on yourself. It feels like it happens quite slowly around the outside until you gain this sort of momentum and you feel like you’re starting to spiral into what really matters. And that’s really isolating that flow zone. And protecting it and putting boundaries up around that and staying in it as much as you can really. COVID doesn’t help with that (Laughter).

Coming Home to Ourselves during COVID19

Mark [8:33] No, I mentioned it wouldn’t help with that. Although one of the experiences of COVID for me, it’s like COVID is forced us to come home to ourselves. There’s less distraction.

Kath [8:48] In a different way. It’s been quite confronting for me. Because I was like, Oh, I know this flow-state. And all I must do is think of it and this energy starts to rise. And then I get in front of a room and I could fly all over the world. And I was travelling like mad and really, it was actually just quite a dispersement of energy. I was beautiful because it was like I was kind of putting my glow everywhere and raising people up and it was great like that. But for me, it was still a much-dispersed sort of feeling and I am forced into staying put and facing all of it. All the ugliness of having to ingrain this shit on a daily level. You know, like all the stuff that’s actually a bit harder.

Mark [9:34] Yeah, all the bits that we don’t want to connect with. All the shadow sides, oh my God here they come (Laughter).

Connecting & Integrating our Shadow Side

Kath [9:44] Oh my God. I feel like a bit of a fraud and having this conversation with you – like, I don’t even know I been doing my practice, you know.

Mark [9:53] And it’s sort of like you’re not the Lone Ranger, I think.  I’ve never been busier since COVID hit because we’ve had to be forced to come home to ourselves. And we need to connect to those parts of ourselves. And that’s not easy. But once we get to connect with them, integrate them, then I believe we can transform.

Kath [10:22] Sorry to interrupt. But I just what kind of got me the deal. The integration is, I always thought these things like you do the work, it’s done. It’s integrated, just coming up in other ways. And it looks – it’s like holding a crystal and having gone from that angle, it’s still pretty ugly.

Mark [10:43] You know, we’d like to push this stuff down with the rabbit holes. The old subconscious rabbit holes, and oh, here I come again.

Self-Transformation Integrating our Shadow

Kath [10:53] Oh, yeah.

Mark [10:54] And it’s wanting a connection to it. The more we connect to it, what do you notice happens in the transformation?

Kath [11:05] Connecting to the…

Mark [11:08] To the shadow bits, that?

Kath [11:10] Shadow.

Kath [11:13] Okay, well, let me think about the last time I did because I’m pretty sure I’ve been pretty, hectically avoiding it lately.

Kath [11:20] But I did some really good work a couple of weeks ago. I mean, I’ve got quite a – I don’t know if I’m unusual or typical with this. I tend to process everyone else’s shit on top of mine. So, I’m a bit of a repository for.  And so, I feel things on a big level. So, I’ve kind of aching for the whole of Melbourne now. And so, I find that quite stifling. So, you’re

Mark [11:49] So, you’re – you’re an empath there?

Kath [11:51] Massively.

My Connection as an Empath

Mark [11:53] And you can intuitively pick up on that and connect to that?

Kath [11:58] Totally, which is obviously that double-edged sword of the genius in my business, right? Because it takes me seconds to work out where someone wants to go. And I cut through all of their bullshit stories and just go – like, well, can we just go there and we do. And it’s always exactly what they want to do. But beyond that, what happens is, when I meet someone like when I met my boyfriend, he said to me. You know he doesn’t love his job, and probably shouldn’t talk too much about it. But he’s a very creative guy, he plays the guitar, he loves building all that sort of stuff. And we’d only known each other a couple of weeks. And we’re standing opposite each other at the kitchen table. And he said you know, how do you -so tell me how you do what you do? And I said, well, tell me a bit about what you love. And he started talking about things he loved. And I said, He said, I don’t… do I want to run a cafe because I love cooking, or do I want to be a builder because I love building. I was like you know what you can be all of it? Like there’s a scenario where all of it is being utilised. And you’re at your highest level of creativity in your highest flow. And he goes, like what? I said, well, why you don’t build a farm with a retreat centre, where you sometimes cater to people. And I just built him a business. And he just looked at me and just went, how do you do that?

Seeing Love & Hope in People

And it’s just it. But that’s to me, that – I’m not saying it to brag, because it’s a pain in the bum sometimes. Because when I see people’s everything – that’s possible for them, when I see all the love and hope, not even hope, just the pure love that we could be operating in through this crisis. But everyone turns on each other so negatively. It makes me sad. Like, in that movie Avatar where the tree was sad. I feel like that most of the time. So, I find that sometimes I’ll get some chunky stuff to clear. So, when I do connect to that, and going back to the question of what it feels like when I do. For me, it is – Oh My god. It’s like the freest feeling. It’s the lightest feeling and I instantly transform everyone else around me is an experience of life.

Kath [14:14] You really do get back what you put out.

Mark [14:18] It sounds real, liberating empowerment.

Kath [14:21] Yes, absolutely. Yeah.

Mark [14:25] When you hit that spot, how does that then flow? How does that energy flow and resonate to the others in your space?

Connecting to Responsibilities in Flow-State

Kath [14:38] I feel a big responsibility. I think like, I’m a mother and I’ve got a new partner and so he’s new stepfather. And so, and I can only talk about this space right now because it’s the only space I’m allowed to be in. You really do see what you want to see. So, I can very, I can get that – whatever – however, I’m feeling about myself, is what I get reflected at me. And so, if I’m feeling expansive, joyful, happy, and uplifted, then they lift to.  And I don’t know if that’s just a woman thing, because you’re often the centre of a household like that, or whether it’s a personality thing perhaps. Like, if I’m in a cranky mood, then it’s clear. But, it’s instant. What I love about it is-is if you’re living with people that are that don’t hold grudges, it is instant. So, you can instantly change your reality by changing it yourself. And I’m not saying that easy sometimes, like, especially like, I know what to do. And sometimes I still go off to do a meditation and quietly, just listen to a guided meditation or something to try and clear that energy and I can’t because it’s sometimes it’s other people’s shit in there that needs a professional like you do get it out. Hmm.

Connecting to my ‘All That Is’

Mark [15:54] You connect to this space, one of the questions that I have been really focused on and it’s what created the World Heart of Connection Day ~ September 4th is the ‘All That Is’ ~ when you drop into that flow-state, are you connecting beyond yourself to oneness with the universe, whatever it is?

Kath [16:20] Even you just saying that like the back of my neck just tightens and tingling? Yeah. It’s god, yes. That see I had the rush just talking about it.

Kath [16:31] It’s, I guess, for anyone listening, like, do you know what like? It’s that feeling when you wake up. I’m just going tell you an analogy where I woke up on – I arrived in Lake Eildon one night, like 3 am, in the morning to a houseboat in the middle of nowhere. We got on a boat in the darkness, pitch black, dark. The moon wasn’t even bright. And we went to bed. And we woke up at like 6 am and I went out and stood on the back deck. And I’d only ever seen Lake Eildon dry and dried up quiet, certainly not rolling green hills or anything. And I woke up and the sun was in exactly the right place. And the hills were the most brilliant green, I’d ever seen. The water was the most brilliant blue I’d ever seen. And I could imagine that must be what it feels like when people take psychedelics. I don’t know. But it was so intense. And, it was because I was so connected in that moment. So, everything becomes brighter and more.

Like Connecting to the Fluid Field

Kath [17:46] Yeah, and you do you feel energy passing between people and plants and all of it. Like it’s everything sort of slows down. It’s like you can feel a pulse or a beat or my osteopath calls it a “fluid field.” Like, resting into that.

Mark [18:10] In that space, I asked a lot of people, when you’re in that zone, that flow-state, that ‘All That Is,’ how would you describe your mental health and your emotional health at that point in time?

Kath [18:29] I mean, you can’t even – what you might want to kind of compare it to, which might be an element of victimhood or story or negativity about something. It’s not even like that exists in the same universe that you’re in right now. It’s like, it’s not like you’ve just put it on hold for a minute, and you still know what it is. It’s like you wouldn’t even be able to define it anymore.

Connecting to our ‘All That Is’ ~ Our Mental Health Dissolves

Mark [18:53] Exactly. It all dissolves.

Kath [18:57] Totally. But it’s like its dissolved, that it was like it was never was.

Mark [19:01] Exactly. Now, if we multiply that effect, you experience it as you’re connecting to the question and experiencing it. And it is really difficult to put a cognitive language to the experience. If we multiply that an each and every one of us starts to connect to that space? What impact do you think that would have on healing Mother Earth?

Kath [19:24] Oh, my God.  You can’t, you just, well – it’s really obvious to me. I mean, look, you put Melbourne in lockdown, and parrots and kookaburras come back over our roof that I’ve never seen before. Flocks of white galas – like they are telling us what they need.  And if you’re in that state, you only – it’s like your radio stations only tuned to one thing which is everything. Rather than the one channel or the algorithm that you’ve been pushed down because of how you have decided to live your life and blinkers on and all of that. So, I mean, it is the only way. It is the only way, maybe that’s why they’re starting to trial pharmaceutical, MDMA and things like that. Because it’s, some people don’t have the discipline to be able to do this. But it needs to be done. Like it’s really sad when you’re like someone like me, or you – pointing at it you and saying me – there you go all us where you were, you know, that that is what’s possible.  And that we’re still living in this alternative reality, you know.

By-Passing the Brains Default Mode Network (DMN)

Mark [20:46] The MDMA is helping us to ~ it helps the brain to negate some of the painful trauma so that trauma can be expressed and released.

Kath [20:55] That’s right.

Mark [20:57] And I wondering it’s really ironic how we just keep circulating around in this ongoing trauma. When in fact, if we’re able to connect deep within ourselves, nothing matters.

Kath [21:13] No. And there’s – and for anyone that’s sort of listening to this and feeling like, connecting deep sounds scary. And trust me, like, I’ve got plenty of trauma that I could connect to. And I do avoid some of it, like for sure. Which means that I’m not in my flow-state all the time. But it’s – I know both sides of the coin. And it’s like, it’s, you assume because life’s taught you that, if you do – if you touch that shame, if you touch that emotional shame, or that whatever that trigger is. That you’re going to unlock, like a jack in the box of – or like, a set of babushka dolls of shit. That gets like dominoes fall, and everything’s going to get worse. But the irony is, it’s like, the minute you take a step towards Mother Earth, she takes 1000 steps back towards you, and makes it easier, not harder. You know, there was nothing hard about my divorce, there was nothing hard about it. But it was absolutely the hardest thing I’ve ever done or should have been the hardest thing I ever did. But it wasn’t because it was right. You know, and it’s, it’s amazing how that happens.

Connecting to Pure Love of Flow-State

Mark [22:27] It’s interesting. You know, the best word I can use sometimes is when we’re in that flow-state ~ that deep ‘All That Is.’ it is. It’s just, it can be like pure love. And when we’re in that pure love, the shame just dissolves in that love. Totally. And there is no shame. It’s gone.

Kath [22:53] And it’s and it’s a beautiful space to be in when you’re in love within a relationship too. Because you can completely accept – like you love that person for who they are. No expectation in – of how they’ll deliver to you in any way. It’s just like a man – it’s like, you’re looking at some sort of glorious ray of light all the time, and it’s a privilege to just be around it.

Mark [23:20] And the more we practice it, the more we can anchor and can come back to it. And as ~ from a Buddhist perspective, everything’s of impermanence. We can’t stay in it, it will pass. And we come back into our personality selves that are all protecting that fragile, pristine essence of our psyche. But it’s so ~ we can do it.

Connecting to Total Acceptance

Kath [23:45] We can totally do it. If I can do it, anyone can do it. Like seriously, I have stuck in my story about five years ago. Like I did a really good job of creating my reality.

Mark [23:57] So how do we get this message out to the world? What do we need to do differently to slowly get the message across?

Kath [24:08] Well, I think first, you have to don’t do what I do, which is wish that it all just happens now because I’m a very you know, fast pause person. And it’s, I think that we must be okay with accepting that just by being ourselves – by taking responsibility for ourselves and staying in that flow-state as much as we can. Which is entirely a state that you can like I laugh like I say that I make money out of it. Like everyone can. I like I was pretty tied into it. Like I used to run a bakery. So, I loved working hard like 14 hour days drive around Melbourne your like good the hardest way you can – kind of thing that was my vibe. So, to pull back from that and to now be making more like four and a half thousand dollars from three to three hours of work in my flow. Like, that’s way more fun for a start.  But by doing it, I’m unlocking it in other people, just by doing what I love. And, that doesn’t mean like to sit down and play the guitar, right? Like you need to zone it. Like if you love playing the guitar, great, that’s your pathway to opening something else up. But keep going and keep going until because there’s something in there that people pay for just to be around your energy. Because it inspires them as you say on a cellular level. You can’t it doesn’t matter the words, you’re coming out of your mouth, that’s what the vibe is giving off, you know,

Mark [25:39] Because what ~ isn’t it something like 87% or something massive that is nonverbal? It’s energetic…

My Advice for the Younger Kath

Kath [25:47] Entirely.

Mark [25:52] If you were to give advice for the young Kath about to embark on her journey of life, what would the piece of advice be for that young Kath?

Kath [26:04] Don’t – absolutely don’t lose your magic. Because the places that when I do my work, the places that I find the magic, which is that point of differentiation. That thing where people want to know, like, who am I, and what do I stand for, and all of that.  That always comes back to the stuff that you did as a kid, just naturally without thinking about it, and just being in your most creative flowy state back then. Like, we just take off, just – do the cliché things. Like go and learn pottery, again. Go and do a life drawing class, whatever it is, that makes you. And notice, what makes you feel like, anything’s possible, like that, like, Ah, you know, kind of vibe. And if it’s flashing in boobs in a bar, then do that. I’ve got no judgement on any of it. Just do whatever makes you feel as free as you possibly can. And do and do that as often as you can. Because it was what you were doing as a kid before you started putting all these filters on and glasses on and how you see life.  This game that I play with, people to kind of get their values and the competencies and their unique edge out. Often comes as one lady told me on one of her answers the other day, you can be a roller-skating DJ if you want to. And it was the answer to something entirely, whatever – but that performed the essence of her entire brand and point of difference. And now she’s free to make money out of something she loves, you know.

Mark [27:35] Just sharing that ~ what was coming to my consciousness as you’re sharing that it’s like your work, you’re enabling them to connect to their true ~ their truest self.

Connecting to the Flow-State of my True Self

Kath [27:47] Totally, absolutely. And then if they want to make money out of that, I’ll package it up as a business. But sometimes I don’t even they just go oh shit, I’m in the wrong business. I want to do what that…

Mark [27:59] What a gift to be able to facilitate that.

Kath [28:03] It’s joyful. I’m pretty…

Mark [28:05] No wonder you get into a flow-state with ~ in that gift?

Kath [28:09] Oh my gosh, it’s so beautiful. Like, it’s just – and even it’s a bit like going to the gym sometimes. Like I work with a lot of people in the UK and so sometimes I might be starting from till 6 pm. And like, five minutes – ‘oh my god’ I much rather have a glass of wine. And as I start talking to them on my computer – Jesus, I’m so lucky that I get to do this work.

Mark [28:31] How do people get in contact with you? What’s the best way that they’re getting contact?

Kath [28:37] I reckon probably send me an email at Let’s Go Kath I reckon that’s probably the best way.

Acknowledgement of Grace Ambrook

Mark [28:46] And just enduring the conversation to close. I’d really wanted to give due acknowledgement to Grace Ambrook.

Kath [28:55] Absolutely.

Mark [28:56] If it wasn’t for Grace, we wouldn’t have connected.

Kath [29:00] I wouldn’t have connected to me.

Mark [29:03] And ditto yeah. So, I really want to give…

Kath [29:07] Grace has been my beautiful energy coach for three years now. And that woman as some sort of expansive gift and she does it. I want to call it to work, but it’s more like play. She does a lot of play on behalf of all of us of channelling in this new energy. She’s incredible.

Mark [29:24] So yeah, it’s wonderful to have had that opportunity to connect to you. Let’s stay in touch. Absolutely. And yeah, I look forward to ~ be a couple of weeks been put it up. But yeah, I’ll stay in touch. Be Gentle. Stay inflow. Stay connected because your connection and your flow are helping Mother Earth survive.

Kath [29:49] Absolutely. Thank you, Mark, ~ your beautiful.

Mark [29:54] Namaste.


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