Connecting to Self Love ~ Episode 107 ~ My Conversation with Gila Nehemia

Heart of Connection Podcast
Heart of Connection Podcast
Connecting to Self Love ~ Episode 107 ~ My Conversation with Gila Nehemia

Connecting to Self-Love

Mark [0:00] I’d like to welcome Gila Nehemia to the World Heart of Connection podcast. I’m your host, Mark, Randall. Gila is all the way from Israel and it’s so lovely to have a connection to you and to have you as a guest on the podcast. Welcome.

Gila [0:14] Thank you. Thank you, Mark, for having me.

Mark [0:17] My pleasure. Where do we start the ball rolling tonight heard we start the process of connection tonight, do you want to give a brief introduction to you to your kind self?

Connecting to My Heart

Gila [0:29] Sure. I’m a sacred circle facilitator, self-love mentor, poet, mystic and author. I guide women primarily to let go of chronic trauma, domestic abuse, sexual abuse, child abuse, those kinds of things. Because I was in that situation as well. And I realised through my process that really just loving myself, into my cells really just opened up my heart. And I would just invite others who are feeling, the stories that I used to play in my mind. By releasing them and just accepting my wholeness. It just took me into a whole another world of opening my heart.

Mark [1:18] Yeah, hence the World Heart of Connection. I believe the heart is so pivotal to our healing and our transformation. In the West, I think we split the heart and the head, the heart and mind. That’s how it is. In terms of connection, how do you connect yourself, do you have a process, daily ritual? What’s you’re doing methods, routines of connecting, firstly to yourself?

Connect to Myself through Writing

Gila [1:56] Thank you for asking that. I connect to myself primarily through writing. As soon as I wake up – just to go through my daily practice. As soon as I wake up, I write whatever I feel is intuitively coming through me. I actually right 4 things, what I’m surrendering to, what I am receiving, and what I’m trusting and what I am releasing. And then as I start my day, I do some self-love affirmations. I connect with nature. And by going out with my dog, or getting that connection also with my animal, spirit, and I start my day. Because that connection to nature is also super important to me with the writing because it brings me back into the present moment. And that’s very important to me.

Mark [2:55] And as we’re connecting in the present moment, sometimes we can be connecting to a real spiritual sense of self. Sometimes we can be connecting to the here and now of the not so nice things in life. When you connect to some of the pain, how do you process that pain? What do you do with that pain? How do you meet it, nourish it, nurture it, release it? How do you connect to it?

Connecting to my Healing

Gila [3:27] Yeah, another wonderful question. So, my modality for healing is writing. So, my first and foremost thing is that I write out what is coming through me, what am I feeling really to accept that emotion. I used to run from it and try to just say, oh, everything’s okay. I don’t need to deal with this, right? I mean, I just get up and go or do something, but it would follow me. So, I’ve learned to accept it by writing it. And then even if I’m feeling like I can’t get up in the morning, to be quite honest, I can’t get out of bed, I would just allow myself to sit in it for a bit. I still get up and I do everything that I needed to, but I would feel the heaviness. And I allow myself to feel it. And I’d also do something to make myself feel good. It could be a hot shower. It could be just sitting out in the sun. Just to nourish me. And every time is going to be might be slightly different. But the biggest thing that I do is how I go into a space of how I can make myself feel good. And that really helps me to move the energy through and actually moving – actually moving – physical movement helps me as well.

Connecting & giving our Wounds what it Needed Back Then

Mark [4:50] It’s interesting isn’t always running away from it. It always seems to chase us and always knocking on our door. And I’m wondering whether it’s wanting the attention that it needed back then. That loving-kindness and the compassion that it perhaps didn’t get back then?

Gila [5:09] Yeah, I think that’s great. I love that statement because I think that many times, I feel that many of the things that I’m feeling are things that didn’t get attention when I was younger. That I didn’t know how to process. I was actually thinking about this before our podcast today when I was walking out with my dog. And, a lot of tragedies have happened to me – my parents died when I was young, and then my husband passed away, six years ago.  And I was very resilient, to be quite honest, I was always like, okay, I’m going to get up, I’m going to – I try to see the silver lining. But what I didn’t do, was really focused on the healing, which I did do these last six years. And that’s been a big change for me.

Mark [6:00] As part of our heart of connection is connecting to the beautiful side, but it’s also connecting to the painful side and healing that painful side not running from it. It’ll keep chasing us. And the more we face it and befriend it ~ give it the loving-kindness that’s enabling it to heal. And the more you heal, what have you noticed as you’ve healed your heart, what are you noticing that does for your connection to yourself?

Connecting to my Limitless Being

Gila [6:31] I noticed that which is part of my own philosophy is that I am a limitless being. I am in a human body, living a spiritual experience. I get to decide how I want to feel and what I want to do with my life. I realise now – the limiting beliefs that kept me back. And that’s why it’s so important for me, it’s my mission to share this with people because I feel many people feel like I did.  That I cannot do X, Y, and Z. But the truth of the matter is, we can do anything. Especially with support, and interdependence working together, which is why I love this podcast and your page, because that’s what it evokes for me.

Mark [7:26] And it’s really interesting, isn’t it that as human beings, we all seem to have a unique individual story. But archetypally at a deep level, we all experience very similar wounds and pain. And the energy’s very similar. And I wonder whether as a society we sort of disconnecting with that sort of stuff are ~ running away from it, but that’s impacting on the world and how we operate within the world.

Connecting with our Inner Self

Gila [7:59] Yes, it’s another thing I really, I say to all my clients. I say all the time, is that every single one of us – just like every – this is what I’ve kind of realised. Like every cell in our body operates so that we can breathe, and we can get up. Just the simple things that we think are so simple, are really not- it’s the inner working inside. And every soul on this planet is so important for our – the betterment of society.  Everything that you can think of, that we want to have, as a part of a good life. You and I and every person watching whoever isn’t watching, it’s so important.

Mark [8:45] And the deeper we connect to ourselves, to reach that spirit essence, the soul essence, it doesn’t matter what we call it ~ that’s that frequency, that vibration, that loving vibration. It’s just such a gift to self, others and ‘All That Is.’

Connecting to the ‘All That Is’

Gila [9:06] It really is. And I feel like, the more pleasure that we give ourselves, which is has been my route, is that when I realised, I could have pleasure, and I could really get new into my own desire and feel good. I was able to give so much more to my children, to the people around me, and primarily, first and foremost to myself.

Mark [9:32] As you’ve done the work on yourself, and you’ve really started to heal the deep inner wounds from childhood, you’ve really established that connection to yourself. How do you notice that connection flowing through to others?

Embodying our Talents & Skills

Gila [9:50] That’s a great question. So, I find that even without realising it, I’m inspirational to many people, especially when they know more about my story. And they see me, choosing to do whatever I desire to do, with my children, not alone, like as a unit.  They find that to be inspirational. And I also find because I’m a poet as well, that my words activate people, I’ve realised what my power is. And I feel like that is been a very important process for me to actually embody that power. And allow – as we embody our own power, other people can realise their own talents, skills and power as well.

Mark [10:40] When you’re talking about those words of the poet, do those words, just arrive in your psyche, intuitively, it just happens, the words just there and where that word comes from?

Focusing on the Positive

Gila [10:56] Well partially. I think I was; my parents were very spiritual. And I think a lot of that, some of that came from them. But I also had a lot of coaches, very personal one-on-one mentoring, that helped me to connect to that power. And also, when I use social media, I only look at positive things. I only look at things that are going to improve my life. And if I’m going down a painful process, I’m looking for, how can I move through it? So, what I’m trying to say is, the words that I feed myself, are those same words. So, if I only move further on to that level of, I don’t know, I can’t think it – of a divinity, I would have to say. How can I raise my vibration and raise the words that I use? Because words to me are so important? Words are to me – magic? What we say we are?

Mark [12:01] When you connect to that power? Can I just check in ~ whereabouts in your body ~ do you sense and feel that power comes from?

Connecting with my Solar Plexus Power

Gila [12:11] Two places. I would say, my solar plexus. Really, the passion, which is a part of the power for me is my sacral. chakra. And connecting it all, I mean, it connects to all. But those are and my heart. So, those three chakras combined. I think that’s what people feel, even when they watch me is that energy flowing?

Mark [12:43] When they’re watching you and they’re connecting to that energy, does their energy then start radiating as a result of your energy. They’ve connected to that energy and there are a mirroring process and energetic connection between the two beings?

The Alchemical Process of Connecting to Others

Gila [12:59] Yes, many times people just get excited when they start talking to me because they see that they can have, they can choose to have a different life. And by just watching me, sometimes they’re able to visualise, their own life-transforming. So, it’s an alchemical process.

Mark [13:23] It’s amazing, isn’t it ~ just happens. That ~ it’s like this invisible energy flowing between two people. And we don’t need words.

Gila [13:35] Right? Oh, my God. Yes, that’s that was my transformation. Being with another person. And just without words, it was just like this click to be quite honest. It was a click happen in my, I don’t know if it was in my psyche. It happened in my heart. And that was the beginning of everything.

Mark [13:58] It’s such a gift to give to yourself and to others. Sometimes, do you need to disconnect to reconnect to yourself?

My Connection with Nature

Gila [14:12] Yes, very much so. That’s why I really like being in nature alone, many times because I need to just listen. And that means not listening just with my ears but listening with my entire – all of my senses. And feeling, feeling back, getting back into the body, and being present with what is and many times that means not connecting to anyone.

Mark [14:48] I sometimes wonder and might sound weird to some people but sometimes I wonder whether nature works with the harmony of love. And out there when we’re in nature, we’re grounded. And it can speak to us in so many different vibrational ways. And there can be such a shift and such a clearing in our own energy.

Gila [15:18] And yes, I completely agree. I’m sorry, go ahead.

Mark [15:21] And unfortunately, we’ve only got 32% ~ 32% of the wilderness left on Mother Earth.

Connecting to our Symbiotic Flourishing

Gila [15:31] Yes I am. My dream is that changes as we all begin to connect more into who we truly are. Because, we are symbiotic, we need everything around us to flourish for us to flourish.

Mark [15:56] And I wonder sometimes, I’ve always had that experience that until we connect to our heart and heal ourselves in that deficit, there’s never been enough and never enough love. And the more we can start to connect with ourselves, there is enough. And when there is enough within us, it’s like the corporate ~ there’s never enough money ~ there is never enough profit in corporations. We can’t dig enough holes ~ there’s never enough holes or never enough iron ore to sell. And will we stop that at a macro level of being able to ~ we are enough, there is enough? And to preserve the beautiful Mother Earth that we’ve got or what’s left of her? I’d be too pessimistic on that note. It is changing I don’t know about you. Can you sense that change?

At Home in Nature

Gila [16:54] I can. I personally, I grew up in New York City, I moved to Israel like six years ago, but I also always lived near a city. And finally, my kids and I travelled to India, we came back, and I realised even before I left, I couldn’t live in the place I was living. It was more in the desert near the city. And I found a beautiful place that preserves, much of the forest. And, that’s what gives me solace. And I feel that many people, especially during this pandemic, a lot of the people from the city were coming to places like this, because it was quiet.  People were staying in their homes, there was still a lot to do outside without, being too close to someone else. So, I think there’s a lot of – there’s a lot of remedies, just being in nature, without even doing anything, it’s healing.

Mark [17:53] And as you’ve been recharged and reconnected to yourself through nature. As you’re working with other people, are you then able to guide them down into their pain and just psychically be there ~ be present to help them heal their pain?

Transformation through Healing our Pain

Gila [18:18] Yes, that is a core part of my process. Because really, the transformation can’t quite occur until we heal the pain. And, that sometimes that scares people because they’re like, I don’t want to go back there. But we have grown so much. And then understanding – sometimes we need that mental and emotional understanding that we are not – that like you said, in the beginning, we’re not the little child anymore. Or we’re not the person that we were 20 years ago. And by witnessing them, I also work with the moon. So, I want to just mention that briefly, because the moon cycle is also very healing when you do the rituals, which is why it’s an important part of my process. I sit, I listen, I write with them, with all my clients. And I introduced them to the new and full moon. The new moon intentions and the full moon releasing. Because when you start to go through that cycle, you realise that your whole. Your light and dark can be balanced. And you can love every part of yourself and say, maybe that part I needed to heal it, but I’m still amazing. I’m even more amazing for having gone through it because now I’m empathetic towards others.

Witnessing & Honouring Others Inner Pain

Mark [19:51] And I really love the words you use just there the witness ~ to be able to witness their pain. To witness their hurt because for them, inside their heart that hurt is real. And for many times, probably throughout their lives, they’re being disbelieved ~ judged for it, and just to heartfeltly and spiritually witness is so healing. Thank you. Well done. I always move the conversation into the tough part ~ tough in terms of the cognitive ability to put words to it. But the connection to the ‘All That Is,’ as you have shared your journey now, and you’re opening, what’s it like to connect to the ‘All That Is’ whatever that is for you?

Gila [20:45] To me, it’s that sense right now, it’s been the sense of liberation. Just like this. I and I don’t know if it will change, but it’s just been like this, almost, that I could tap into the flow – when I’m desiring it. And it’s not consistent yet. But I find that it to be, I don’t know, mind-blowing that can happen. I’ve been reading about it for so many years. And, thinking about it, but the biggest part, I guess, for me was the acceptance, that whatever was-was. And if, – when I do connect, because I used to whenever I was in the flow, I used to be able to. But now I can really train myself to do it more on a consistent basis.

Connecting to our Flow-State in ‘All That Is’

Mark [21:44] To keep coming back to that flow-state within. And by being in that flow-state ~ can you describe what the energy is like, the energy and the frequencies like as you’re in that flow state?

Gila [22:01] Yes, it is. It feels – it feels timeless. And just almost like the word evokes – like this river that’s just moving. With the current – sometimes it’s stronger. Sometimes it’s less strong or a little bit weaker. But it’s – it is this constant movement, of sacredness, I don’t know how to describe it. It just seems really – feels good inside.

Mark [22:38] Yeah, it’s hard to put the cognitive the intellectual language to what you’re experiencing. The energies moving in, as you’re sharing it with me. I was just wondering, how much do you align physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, in that flow?

Gila [22:55] Um, how much do I align to it?

Mark [22:57] Yeah. How do you? How do you align physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, when you’re in that flow? Fully aligned?

Pure Alignment in ‘All That Is’

Gila [23:06] Yeah, I feel completely aligned. I feel complete like in this holistic state of – I’m no longer – I was just, we’re talking about this with somebody else. Like, I’m no longer allowing the, (one of my clients actually), we’re no longer allowing the storm to take us. Even in the storm. It’s like we are balanced and it’s not an easy thing to maintain. But with the work and the habits, it really does help.

Mark [23:39] Yeah, from a Buddhist perspective, everything’s of impermanence.

Gila [23:43] Right.

Mark [23:44] And it will pass, and we can reconnect to it. One of the questions I always ask people as they’re experiencing energetically that flow. And it’s interesting to start using zoom because on the audio, the audio was just not enough to capture the energetic presence that I would have with the person that I’m having the conversation with. When you’re in that flow, can you describe what happens to your mental health when you’re in that flow?

A Flow-State of no Storyline ~ Poem Infinite Love

Gila [24:22] Um, I’m not thinking. I lose all storyline. No storyline anymore. It just is – like, even when I’m cleaning the house, I am – I’m just glad – that’s why I like to clean because it’s also decluttering my mind. And it helps me with my creative flow. I would love to share a short poem, maybe to get that essence if you don’t mind.

Mark [24:51] Please I don’t mind at all. I’d love you too.

Gila [24:54] Um, so it’s called infinite love. And I just, I wrote this right recently around the 11:11 portal. Closing my eyes, I feel your energy piercing through me. Covering my hands with my face. Allowing your frequency to encompass my spirit, my aura enveloping me like a cloak safe, secure and deliciously seductive. You see through me into my heart and soul moving beyond time and space sense – I am on another planet with you – a galaxy far, far away, calling me now. My heart is exploding. My body trembling, anticipating your soft electric touch on my skin. Your passionate lips touching mine, your music igniting, vibrating every cell in my body into the infinite oneness, zero Point field.

My Sense of Self Dissolves in Flow-State of ‘All That Is’

Mark [26:05] We don’t need words to do we. Just stay in the space ~ such a beautiful space. And thank you for sharing just that resonance of the ‘All That Is’ ~  what a gift to self, others & ‘All That Is’ is and it’s just so beautiful too ~ Is it sort of like sometimes a sense when you’re in that space that your sense of self dissolves? And you’ve connected to the oneness. The oneness and beyond?

Gila [26:36] Yes. Like I don’t even – I don’t even exist like the form doesn’t exist. I’m just like this floating soul. Or this, ball of love that’s just floating in the air.

Mark [26:52] And can I ask a question? Half of these are leading questions probably. When you’re in that space, in that flow, you’re in that ball of love. As more and more human beings learn to connect to that essence and that gift within themselves, what impact do you think that will have on healing Mother Earth?

Our Inner Healing Heals Mother Earth

Gila [27:21] I think, really to be quite honest, it’s going be phenomenal. Um, that’s why I’m so committed to this mission. I was – I never actually thought I had a purpose in life, to be completely honest with you. I just thought I’d be like, working in some high-tech company, and pass away at some point. But when I found it, oh my goodness, it transformed the way I saw myself and everyone else. And I became more cognizant I was anyway, but I became more cognizant of what I am. Even what my – my footprint is.  We became vegans, my children I during our travels in India. And it was very important, we’re still – and that’s why we chose this community because they’re vegans and their vegetarians. So anyway, what I’m trying to say – is that when we become conscious and aware of what we’re doing and how it’s feeding our soul, it’s guaranteed that Mother Earth is healing. That’s why I’m so excited to connect with you and other like-minded people because this is changing the world.

Mark [28:40] Yeah. Mother Earth is a gift to us. And we can gift it back to her. And we need to gift it back to her for the beautiful gifts she’s given us.

Gila [28:57] Yes.

Connecting to our Essence of Being

Mark [28:58] I just want to sit in the ~ just the energy of the moment ~ I can just sense and feel in me that resonant energy with you. And it’s such a beautiful flow. It’s such a beautiful connection. And as we ~ more and more of us align with this connection ~ how healing can be?

Mark [29:27] How do people get in touch with you to ~ sorry to bring you out of that space. I’ll let you come back.

Mark [29:42] How do people get in touch with your beautiful work?

Gila [29:46] Thank you. Um, so my website, Gila It’s my name. And I have a lot of resources that are complimentary right on my website. They can access and they can also schedule a chat or a call straight from there as well.

Mark [30:08] What would be a piece of advice that you would give a younger version of yourself embarking on her life’s journey right this minute?

My Advice for the Younger Me

Gila [30:19] So, the piece of advice that I would give, would be to trust your feelings, trust your intuition. That would have changed the trajectory of my life if I would have been more in touch with that earlier on. Because that is a truth. And that’s a lot of my guidance is trusting your intuition. And your feelings of like, that just doesn’t seem right. Like that’s true.

Mark [30:53] Be more cognizant and more aware and just listen and hear what the heart is saying?

Gila [31:01] Correct.

Mark [31:03] One of the things I say a lot to men is getting out of your head and into your hearts.

Gila [31:09] Yes. And same for women, I say the same thing. Because when we can really feel, sometimes we’re asking yourself, is this working? Why am I doing this? And, it’s always -my first coach, actually, she asked me, what do you want me to say to you when you’re in that state of like anxiety? And then I said, to connect to my heart, what is my heart telling me that was what I said to her? What is my heart telling me? And I continue to use that advice for myself at this point, as well. What you know, really connecting to your heart is the truth.

Getting out of our Heads & into Our Hearts

Mark [31:50] Yeah, I just took a deep breath into my heart and connected to it just then.

Mark [31:54] Well done. Thank you so much for sharing your story and having this conversation. I hope that by having conversations with a lot ~ with people that are aligning and doing the healing that we’ll spread the message and increase the connections to self, others and ‘All That Is.’ And in that journey, let’s all work together to heal Mother Earth and make this a better place too ~ for our children and our grandchildren and soul to enjoy the rich beauty and the rich gifts that she has given us all.

Gila [32:42] And so is – thank you so much, Mark.

Mark [32:45] My pleasure. I’m just ~ Namaste.

Gila [32:50] Namaste.


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