Healing & My Aligned Path of Purpose ~ My Conversation with Zoe Bell

Mark [0:00] Hello Zoe, welcome to the heart of connection podcast.  Thank you for being a guest on the podcast. I’m your host, Mark Randall and lovely to have some time with you to have a conversation about the heart connection. Just by way of starting Zoe, would give a brief story about yourself?

Zoe Bell Brief Personal Story

Zoe [0:17] Cool, thank you, Mark, for inviting me on to the show.  For the view is a brief story, I came from a background of personally going a through a lot of trauma, a lot of adversity and the pathway of my own healing, my journey of healing mind, body, and remember who I came here to be.  In a really simple way of putting it, led me down that path of training and modalities to do with the mind, trauma release, sensuality, intimacy, bodywork, yoga, all of that.  So it’s been a beautiful journey of that adversity and trauma which would then unlock my gifts, to then share with people that I get the pleasure of working with.  In a nutshell, that’s probably the simplest way to describe it.

The Beautiful Sydney

Mark [1:16] Where are you based? You’re in Sydney

Zoe [1:18] I’m in Sydney I’m in the inner west and Balmain and Rozelle area.  I’m also a Star Magic energy healer which has been something that sort of happened quite recently.   Based in the Inner West.

Mark [1:38] I always love to go to Sydney and I love to sit it circular key.  There’s something about Sydney that always draws me.  The bridge is just an amazing, that space up there.  I know I’m on a holiday, I am a different state.   I drove up there just a couple of weeks ago to gets some chairs from IKEA, it was actually funny.

Zoe [1:58] I can see the harbour bridge from where we live, which is pretty cool.  I can say it from our children’s bedroom.  It’s great, I think we’re really blessed where we live as we have a great community.  It has a really nice community vibe which, I think in a lot of parts of Australia, that’s sort of been lost.  I feel very blessed where we live.

Mark [2:23] With the conversation of the heart of connection.  When you think about that subject, the Heart of Connection, what comes to your mind and heart as you reflect on the Heart of Connection to self, others and All That Is?

Coming Into the Heart we By-pass the Mind

Zoe [2:43] You have sort of like, summed up in a sentence.  To actually feel into the heart, we need to bypass and get past the mind.  What we see, the lens and it holds a really deep resonance in my heart from the journey of being very blocked in my mind.  I did not really know where to turn and feeling very lost at times.  Then having simple processes that I would integrate every day.  I then started to bring my heart and mind into alchemy.  It’s when we can bring both of them into alignment with one another, so they are working with one another, rather than against.  It’s really beautiful and with that, as well, the whole the left-hand side of the brain and the right-hand side of the brain is logic.  The left is creative, and which I feel is more where the heart is fully expressing and it’s free, for what we each came here to share.  So bringing them into harmony as well, that aspects of the mind.

I then started to bring my heart and mind into alchemy. Click To Tweet

Mark [3:59] How would you go about bringing them into harmony, how would you describe that?

The Paths of Healing

Zoe [4:04] So there’s a different way that I’ve used with different souls that I’ve worked with.  I have practiced and teach Vedic meditation, which many know as Transcendental Meditation.  I guess, from my own and other people that I’ve worked with, to get past the mind almost it rewires the whole neuroplasticity.  It basically gives the mind or the noisy part of the mind, the ego, the I part of the mind, something to entertain it.  So then the person that’s actually practicing it, can actually feel a moment of restfulness and peacefulness.  Over time, what that does is then allows their minds to rest.  They start to drop more into and have the ability to be less in their mind and not in resistance.  Being able to get past, probably the easiest way to describe is getting past the security department of the mind.  This is stopping them from dropping into their heart, which obviously takes courage to let down the barriers.  Then they start to have that heart  and mind alchemy.  The other way has been through different trauma releases with activating the energy in the body.  That brings a soul into a really safe space, where they basically get to drop deeper into their body and more into the energetic body.  This is moving past the physical and then into more of a feeling state.  Here it is like the mind gets to be put to one side, and they get to see the energy starts to awakens.  They start to awaken the energy within their body but then what starts to happen is they connect with the divine energy.  This starts to flow through, the life force.  This has had a really powerful way of finding out those areas within the body that are blocked or this hidden trauma or the hidden stuff.  It’s like the old story that’s hidden there in the tissues of the body.   It is finding its way through there, so it starts to bring in more light, which allows the starting to experience more of them feeling of love.  They have these massive releases through this every specific method and I am trying to explain it in the simplest way without giving it a name or a label.  It’s a healing process where the mind gets out of the way and even the body gets out the ways.  Like imagining the bodies in utero as well, it feels safe and it then lets down its barriers.

They start to awaken the energy within their body but then what starts to happen is they connect with the divine energy. Click To Tweet

The connection of Freedom beyond the Mind

Mark [7:05] What’s it like, what is the connection like when you can get past the mind and the body?

Zoe [7:11] Well it is free.

Mark [7:15] In that freedom, where do you go?  Can you describe where do you go in that freedom?

Zoe [7:21] Where do you go?

Mark [7:23] What happens to you?

Zoe [7:27] It will be different for everybody.  I don’t like to you can have an experience.  It can be an experience a state of nothingness, to describe it. It is still that logic is the mind that is coming in there.  So to me, it feels it feels light, it feels expansive rather than feeling contracted.  If you give it the opposite. It can feel, it’s going to feel different things to different people.  There are different levels of it.  It is not about getting to a destination.  It’s like layer, a small layer may dissolve then that person gets to feel into and breathe into that space.   Then they have this and that may stay for a certain time and then I go back to those habits.  So you are constantly expanding.

No Mind Analysis in the Deeper Connection To Self

Mark [8:32] Is there when you’re in that freedom, is there a deeper connection to self?

Zoe [8:39] Totally, because there’s no analyzing of it.  There is not even any label given to it.  It’s being in that state of total presence of, I mean, everyone says oneness, and but you have an experience of what love can feel like, with no other need of it, being about another person.   It’s totally felt within the body, within that experience.

Mark [9:12] It’s pretty powerful.

Zoe [9:13] I’m trying to explain in the right way, without giving any attachment.   That is the challenge. That’s where the mind goes oh, wow.  Okay. I’m relaxing, I’m relaxing, am I feeling that, am I my feeling that and then the minds playing this little game, right?  So people that are listening that it’s going to feel like this, but we’ll hang on a minute, it didn’t feel like that, well what’s wrong with me and that’s when the mind kicks in again.  So, it’s almost like when you, it’s the feeling if you can rewind back when you are like five and six and you were just in total playfulness and like focused but the presence of focus without any need to be doing anything.  I want to say like a state of nothingness but to even say that without the experience of it, doesn’t mean anything,

Trauma Dissolves in Our Deeper Connection to Self

Mark [10:14] What happens to the trauma when we’re in that – when we are connected to that space?

Zoe [10:20] It starts to dissolve and it starts to be released.  In an energetic release, when they feel safe when we are able to let down the shields.  Without any thought without any going into it.   That’s the challenge, I find that’s why so many people are stuck and blocked there.  They’ve put up the walls of the resistance because time and time again on let’s talk about it.  Let’s go into that and let’s talk about it.  That’s why oh it keeps you stuck.  So when you actually have that permission, that you don’t have to talk about it, you don’t have to analyze it, you can just, you don’t even have to have a name for it. It’s just stuff releasing it stuff coming out.  It’s like it could be expressed in tears, in crying and laughter and sobbing.  Just this heat going through your body like this massive or it could feel like you’re choking is it’s like coming out the body.  When it comes out, it’s like this massive let down.  It’s definitely like a letdown.  It’s like being in a state of constant tension and not even being aware that you have so much tension in your skin. To then just like relaxing.  Feeling like you actually have a different body suit on that’s the best way I can describe it.

Body Armours to Protect Ourselves

Mark [11:42] Is the tension like an armouring?

Zoe [11:44] The tension, yeah, you’ve got the armour.  The protective armour, the layers of armour, but sometimes it can become I had an experience last year, after doing 15 years of like, massive releasing.  Then again last year, another experience.  Which was my entire body suit changed?   I was unaware.  We can have the armour but we can have the residual tension.  We need to have some form of tension in myofascial like the tissue.  Otherwise, we would just be like this piece of jelly on the ground.  We wouldn’t have any structure.  When you’ve constantly got that tension in your body, in that becomes your normal state of being, then to let that go, it can be scary for people.  To feel really alive as well can be scary for people.  Like wow, they felt so dead and numb inside and then suddenly feel this surge of energy flowing through their body.  It can almost feel like orgasmic and yet so beautiful when you let go into that. So beautiful sensual experience.

 Peace of Heart, Peace of Mind

Mark [13:03] Sometimes really hard to cognitively describe what we’re trying to talk about.  It’s more at a felt sense.

Zoe [13:12] You need to experience it.

Mark [13:14] It is more experiential.  I have always gone the other way.  For me, it’s ‘peace of heart – peace of mind’, not the other way.  If I’m into my heart, part of my heart carries trauma but if I can heal that trauma, I can then reach that deeper essence.  When we hit into that deeper essence, do you feel or sense that you are connecting to an energy greater than self?  Connected to a divine?

Zoe [13:42] Yes, you’re the divine, the cosmic energy, the godly source whatever you want to call it.  Your, that’s the experience of oneness, right?  The only thing separating you and I and everyone else is the vessel we are in.  Then that vessel has armour around it or stuff in it.  That’s the separation but it is it’s connecting to the divine.  When people are releasing and activating this energy, there’s no conscious awareness, they’re not moving consciously this surging energy is, it’s the Divine, it’s Consciousness flowing through almost penetrating every cell of their being and the movements can be quite sporadic and sometimes going into like yoga postures.  That life force energy is like flowing through freely and it’s almost being allowed just to flow through and do what it needs to do.

Our Mental Health Dissolves

Mark [14:44] What happens to a mental health when we’re in that space?

Zoe [14:49] Mental wellness.  (Laughter).  You know, it can sound like mental madness.  If you were you a bystander and you suddenly plunked in a room with this going on what you what you would hear you would it would sound like a mental asylum.  I have worked in psychiatric nursing it would sound like a mental asylum as if they have gone into riots because there are people screaming, there are people moaning, there are people shouting, crying, sobbing laughing like it sounds crazy town.  For the onlooker looking in but also as well when you’re in there and other people around you doing that, it gives you even more permission of like to get out of the way of yourself, to get out of the way of the mind and judgment, to get out  in mind of rightness or wrongness

Mark [15:45] Is that bodies?

Zoe [15:46] Yeah it’s powerful.

Releasing our Emotional Health

Mark [15:47] Is that the body’s cathartic release of the residual trauma and what’s trapped at a cellular level, is that cathartic release?

Zoe [15:55] Yes, it’s releasing stuff, whatever needs to release.  It may be releasing what I find a lot of us that have been carrying stuff around, that is not even our stuff.   I think a lot in the Aboriginal community as well, a lot of the younger teenagers and children, have learned a lot from what they’ve seen.  They are already coming out so much more advanced.   It is seen from a contrast as with anyone when they’re born into born into a family, and that the seen from that.  What’s happening, is things have been handed over by generation.  A lot of the stuff that I feel I have released for my body.  This may sound really confusing for maybe some of the listeners.   It wasn’t even from this lifetime. There were things that were blocking and holding me back.  I could not see, I had no conscious awareness and this is like what happened six weeks ago.  I work in this area and this was another layer but then having that removed from my energetic fields, timelines collapse, it’s completely shifted.  It’s like it’s a never-ending, of this beautiful, unlaying and when those layers release, having that time to integrate.  Having that time to feel into the new space and not be in a rush to have to get it.  A lot of that self-nourishment, I think it’s not necessarily what happens in the room.  We are in there doing these processes, but it’s like, opening the door to go deeper. It’s what is happening in between that and sometimes people going back to their old habits.  They are starting to over a time, starting to choose habits which are more nourishing for themselves.  To connect more with their hearts.

They are starting to over a time, starting to choose habits which are more nourishing for themselves. To connect more with their hearts. Click To Tweet

Learning New Habits of Loving-Kindness & CompassionKindness, Love, change, start, attitude

Mark [18:04] Some of the new habits is learning to have loving-kindness and compassion.  They were not on the landscape before?

Zoe [18:12] Yeah, because we’re trained from when we are younger.  When you go to take a piece of cake, never take the biggest piece.  Always take the smallest piece.  This has been ingrained since we were small.

Mark [18:29] The conditioning?

Zoe [18:30] Yeah, the conditioning to put someone first.  I’ve already taught my children they are 10 and 11, they’ve seen from an early age at 2 and a half to 3 and a half is if I am meditating and I am doing my practice do not disturb me unless you’re either choking to death or bleeding to death.  This is my time, to teach them that I come first.  Then they come first because if I don’t have my mask, there is nothing to give them and I am not in that in that state to be who I need to be, for them.

The Layers of Healing Will Heal When It is Ready

Mark [19:06] As you’re working through this process, does a deeper layer of the trauma come forward to be healed?

Zoe [19:18] If I, look back at it from 15 years because there have been layers.  It doesn’t all come at once, it all gone.  What will comes out will be what you’re nervous systems ready to process to come.  Otherwise, it’s like something in the system blows.  So it comes out in layers when it’s ready.  Or when the person is ready for it to come out.  When they’re ready to let it down, sorry, when they’re ready to let go of it.

Mark [19:53] That’s when their psyche is ready?

Zoe [19:57] Yeah, or sometimes you there is a deep aspect that wants it.  The psychology as people you don’t want to be in.  If you ask people are saying I don’t want to be in pain and avoid everything that can.  There is also an aspect deep within and this can be challenging for people to hear.  They actually and I say this from personal experience, I loved the pain, I enjoyed being in pain.  I got 3 things from it.  I got attention, I got acknowledgment and I felt some form of affection.  I created more pain in my body because my body was so numb on the inside.  I actually felt something, I was unable to feel so I had to learn to go beyond the pain and that’s where pleasure was found.

The Inner Calling To Nourish & Nurture Our Emotional Pain

Mark [20:52] Is there an inner calling within each of us to nourish and nurture that pain?

Zoe [21:00] Yeah, acknowledge it, and nourish it and give it space.  Even grief that is another aspect that I work really deeply with people.  It’s honoring that.  It may not be grief directly to you.  Everyone may have grief for humanity, the grief of Mother Earth, all of it.  Really honour it and embellish it.   Milk everything, you can out it.  Juice everything out of it, and then put it down.  It is more damaging to keep playing that same thing each and every day it gets exhausting.   If you can feel it, just really feel it.  If you’re really angry, they just feel really angry.   Anger is better than getting depressed.

Feeling It to Heal It Allowing Our Trauma Release

Mark [21:52] Feel it to heal.

Zoe [21:54] Yes, feel it to heal it.  That’s the whole thing, it like people need to allow the whole trauma release.  Whatever doorway is used, the energy needs to come out some way.  We either fart it out, we poop it out, we’ve vomited it out, we purge it out in some way.  It needs to come off the out of the channel.

Mark [22:20] As you’ve cleared the trauma in your psyche, what do you notice?  What do you experience, it’s role in your connection to others?

Zoe [22:37] My role and connection?

Healing/Clearing Our Trauma Deepen Our Beautiful Reflection

Mark [22:40 ] The clearing of our trauma.  Once the trauma is cleared, the clearing of trauma does that deepen your connection to others?

Zoe [22:51] To be a beautiful reflection of them.  They don’t need to keep carrying it around anymore.  There is an invitation that they can actually let go.  It is not taking any, it is about to stop feeding it by acknowledging it and honour it and show them that they can create a new story.  They can create a new story.  They can even change their past from what happened.  They can shift it, from the most traumatic thing into like, I really do believe that.  I would not go back and change your thing, I really wouldn’t because I wouldn’t be having that understanding now.  And I wouldn’t remember who I came here today be.

Mark [23:44] So the past is the teacher?

Experiences as the Teacher

Zoe [23:50] The experience is.

Mark [23:52] Is the teacher?

Zoe [23:54] Were the teachings.  This is going to be really hard for you know, and a lot of people aren’t ready for this.  Depending on as you know there are different phases of the trauma. Like the acute.  What I am talking to you about is chronic, it’s been there for a long time.   I am definitely not referring to the acute because that it’s a different ball game.  It needs to be handled in a very different way.   This needs to be handled in a nourished way as well.  It gets a point of, where that trauma has become your identity.  That can be the hardest thing is to put it down.   It is not who you are.

Getting Lost in the Identity of Our Trauma

Mark [24:45] Do we get lost in that identity?

Zoe [24:47] We can get totally lost in that identity?

Mark [24:53] And what happens to our connection when we get lost in that identity?

Zoe [24:57] You actually become more and more disconnected.   You’re actually speaking from what I then noticed is a pattern.  There was a pattern.  Anyone who is listening, just see if there’s a pattern.   What I noticed was I was creating these scenarios and they kept getting louder and louder and more in my face.  Until like wow, I’m actually being the cause.   I am not saying it was my fault.   I am not saying it as an unconscious projection.  It was unconscious as I wasn’t consciously projecting it.  On an unconscious level the programming was so deep inside that I was angry with the world.  I was pissed off and angry with the world.   What did I attract more things or the vibration of another soul who had the exact vibration of worthlessness, hopeless, helpless, but into my energetic field?

Know Thyself Healing Our Suffering blesses Mother Earth

Mark [25:56] The more each and every one of us heals our trauma and connects deeper to the essence of self, at a collective consciousness level, what impact might that have on Mother Earth?

Zoe [26:13] Huge, it’s like the whole thing why are we here?  To know thy self.  Suffering is a doorway to know thyself.  It’s also a doorway to discover happiness.   No matter what has happened outside of Self is not happening in this moment right now.

Suffering is a doorway to know thyself. It's also a doorway to discover happiness. Click To Tweet

Mark [26:40] Is there an unconditional love in that?

Zoe [26:44] When you get through all of the junk has gone through and learning the lessons? Yeah, there’s unconditional love for all people involved in whatever that was.  We are all learning.

Mark [27:03] And what happens if we’re all collectively get into that thread, into that energy of that unconditional love?

Zoe [27:11] Well we understand the true meaning of compassion.  The true meaning of compassion and unconditional love is to not change anything.

Our Higher Vibration is Infinitely Powerful

Mark [27:20] How do you think the energy of the universe would be if we were able to manifest that on a higher level?

Zoe [27:28] Super powerful. So infinitely powerful its own natural state of being.  We have so many things that tell us that can’t or we are stuck.  So many subliminal messages based on fear.

Mark [27:43] Are we returning there?

Zoe [27:48] I think there’s a fine line right now.  I really feel that is a separation happening of really working with people that are really ready to change.  People are like, I want to go down that path rather than trying to convince skeptics.  I really feel it right now.

Always Walking My Aligned Path

Mark [28:09] It’s a beautiful path.

Zoe [28:10] At the end of the day it’s all free will and choice.  It’s all free will and choice with whatever we choose at that moment.

Mark [28:17] Once we are on that path, it’s an amazing path?

Zoe [28:21] It’s a beautiful a path and you know it’s like you can there’s no there’s no right or wrong turn.  There’s no right or wrong turn on this path.  There’s a way.

Mark [28:34] You touching it?

Zoe [28:35] Beautiful soul.

Mark [28:37] As we’re having this conversation are you touching the path now?

Zoe [28:42] Am I walking the path now?

Mark [28:43] As your touching it?

Zoe [28:44] I was always walking the path before.  I needed to get lost on the path, to learn whatever I needed to learn.

Each Detour Path will Teach Us Growth

Mark [28:51] What brings you back?

Zoe [28:58] No right or wrong.   I went, I asked to go on a massive detour before I even came back.  I was like give it all to me as I am going to clean up this stuff.  Bring me what I need so I can grow.

Mark [29:11] Well done.

Zoe [29:13] Right, it’s the teaches, it’s the growth, it’s the experience if we can be de-charge, we can detach and it really discharges the charge around it.

Mark [29:26] You know I’m really fortunate to be able to have these conversations with people like yourself?

Opening to More Self Growth without Suppression

Zoe [29:32] I think we need to have more this.  As people when they realize if they were to turn off the TV.  Stop being fed the bullshit that was being fed.  To keep us stuck.  Even the psychologist, the psychiatrist when I came off medication.   I’m not saying do this, but I say I don’t want to be on it anymore.  Their answer now was known in another six months.  I asked another six months of what and then what?  They did not want me because they did not know.

Mark [30:11] Six months of more suppression?

Zoe [30:14] Six months of more suppression and when I started feeling numb and then I realized, well at least when I was all over the place in a crazy eight-an of high-low, high-low, if you imagine an eight on a horizontal line In the crazy 8, at least I got to feel something.  I got to feel pain or got to feel excitement or something.  When I was on medication us for that mining and I’m dead.

Grof’s Spiritual Emergency Concept

Mark [30:37] From a Holotropic breath work perspective, the Stan Grof stuff, he’d call that the spiritual emergency.

Zoe [30:44] Yeah.

Mark [30:47] The system, unfortunately, is not set up.

Zoe [30:51] I wasn’t even breathing. I wasn’t even breathing.  I was like a balloon in the wind and I think that will relate to so many people that do hear this.  They will know someone, you’re not a cause of your life.  Your life is a pure existence from every other energy around you and it gets exhausting.   Just like trauma, trauma, drama, drama, drama, and whoo it’s dizzy?

Mark [31:21] And from that, we learn and grow.  How do we then bring that loving kindness that aligned path to that space and holds that space to nourish ourselves in that space?  I sort of jokingly say, I’d love to levitate above Tibet 24/7 but I can’t it just possible.  I have to live in this world and when the trauma arises again okay how do I hold that space.  The more I can hold that space, the more I can then dissolve it in that aligned path.  That’s the healing, that’s the gift.  That self-gift of totally deep unconditional love and the more we do it as human beings, this energy is going to heal Mother Earth.  It’s just massive and I think there’s a real shift.  I can feel that shift coming there’s so many of us on that aligned path ready to, “come on let’s go, let’s do this.”

That self-gift of totally deep unconditional love and the more we do it as human beings, this energy is going to heal Mother Earth. Click To Tweet

Zoe [32:20] Yep.

Mark [32:22] Zoe, are there any messages that you would like to share to listeners to invite them to – what would be a message?  Is there a message you’d like to put out there today?

The Beautiful Offering of Wherever You Are At

Zoe [32:38] To know that wherever you’re at is a beautiful offering and it’s terfect.  I know even in the most adversity where you feel like can be the greatest fuel to project you into the direction of your deepest desire.  So to tune to how your heart maybe is to place your hands over your heart and simply close your eyes.  Just ask yourself, asked your Soul, what do I need right now.

Mark [33:17] And it will have the wisdom.

Zoe [33:19] To know you’re never alone.  To reach out.  There are people like ourselves that have walked this path we’re still walking it.  I’m far from perfect.  I had a massive emotional release last night from a beautiful Soul holding space for me.  They highlighted something which I was resisting to see.  It was beautiful, I got to cry and release with no story, to say thank you and then grow into that new space.

Mark [33:55] Zoe, I really want to thank you for sharing this beautiful energy that have been sitting with in this conversation.  Thank you for that connection. Thank you for the joy, the gift, and thank you for being part of the Heart of Connection Facebook community group.  The more we do this, the more we put out there.  What a beautiful healing energy that we can offer, we’ve all got that ability, we’ve all got that gift.

Zoe [34:29] I want to say thank you so much, I am buzzing with love right now.

Mark [34:32] Yeah ditto.

Zoe [34:32] Oh, yeah.

Mark [34:37] Hey let’s come back to it another time.

Zoe [34:39] I’d love to, be honoured.

Mark [34:42] I just want keep them around about 30 minutes or people can listen to them as their travelling.  Let’s reconnect.  We’re connected on via Facebook.  Yeah, let’s come back for another conversation.

Zoe [34:54] Thanks for all you do beautiful Soul.

Mark [34:56] Ditto, thank you Namaste

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