My Connection to Radio

Mark [0:00] I’d like to welcome Lee Stamps (Stampsy) from K Rock to the World Heart of Connection Podcast.

Lee is an announcer here and music director and she wears many hats here at K rock.  I’m not gonna give it due justice by trying to tell everybody what she does.  So I might ask Lee (Stampsy) if she could introduce herself.

Stampsy [0:26] Yeah sure.  I’m the network music director for the Grant Broadcasters network.  But here at K Rock I’m the music director and I’m the drive announcer of the departure lounge.  So I’m one half of on-air team from 4 to 6 our till alongside my co-host, Josh.

My Childhood Connection to Radio

Mark [0:40] Great.  Connection to radio.  Can you tell me what bought you or what took you into the connection to radio?

Stampsy [0:50] My earliest memory was my Mum coming into my bedroom, I must have only been 11.  I should have been asleep but there I am underneath my doona with my radio listening to the hot 30 countdowns.  I was wanting to know what number one was going to be and having Mum whip the doona off my bed.  You need to sleep nut we’re early at number two.  I just loved music and I can’t sing as I’m tone-deaf.  I’ll attempt in the shower but I just love the impact, the feeling and the emotion that music drives.  I just love envisioning being on a stage or dancing along to a tune or just feeling happy from the song all the way music makes me feel.  So that was probably my earliest memory of radio.  But I didn’t want to get into the radio at a young age.

My Connections to Sport

Stampsy [1:50] I was a major tomboy – I was a big tomboy.  I loved my sport would play absolutely anything and everything.  I played Netball for 13 years and was trying out for state teams.  I had this vision because I was a bigger child and I didn’t think I was going to be athletic or in the athletic field.  So I went – I think I might get into sports psychology or sports Physiotherapy, so I can still be in that sporting arena.  I think in Year 10 you do work experience for a week and I couldn’t get into any of my placements.  So Mum just said to me, look as a community radio station down the road.  Why don’t you go there for a week?  You love music, it’s really close so I can drop you off.  Do that for a week and then we’ll look at getting you some placement in sports, physio or sports psychology.

Reading the Weather Hooked Me

So I ended up doing the week at Plenty Valley FM out in Mill Park.  And on day three, I remember the station manager let me read the weather on the radio.  Drop mike that was the beginning.  That for me was the moment where I went – I get paid to talk and I’m pretty good at it – I talk a lot.  So for me, oh there’s this avenue of where I get paid to play music and I get to talk.  I get to talk to people and interview and have a laugh.  It’s entertaining, and I’m driven and I get to do really cool things.  So I ended up doing community radio, for three years just for that one week of work experience.

Mark [3:23] In the work there is a connection.  It’s an interesting connection because you can’t necessarily see the impact of your connection.  Can you sense the connection from a felt sense?

Stampsy [3:39] It’s a really interesting question because they are days I genuinely forget that people listen to me – every single day.  We recently had a radio survey and we came back as the number one most listened to drive show.  My mind and my heart just exploded.  I went wow there’s 10s of thousands of people out there who listen to me waffle every day.

Making a Difference to Just One Person

But then there are some days where I will get a message in the inbox on my personal Instagram. And someone will go on I was laughing along with that because I did the same thing yesterday or thank you for talking about that. I’m going through that same struggle myself. And for me, I’m just talking, I’m just connecting with my co-host because you can’t picture in reality can’t picture talking to 10, 20, 30,000 people.  You want to make that intimacy of one on one so I’m just focusing on my car horse, but then I’ll get a message and from that message, I’m thinking wow, just the simplest active chatting to a big-name music star or talking about International Women’s Day or talking about my own struggles with RUOK day that’s connected with someone.  And that’s made a difference and if you just reach that one person – it’s cliche, but if you speak to one person and you helped change one person’s life and you’ve made a huge difference in the world.

My Journey to Being on Air

So, yeah I wasn’t always on air.  I initially started my radio career in audio production.  So I was making commercials and then very quickly realised that I couldn’t be trapped in a booth for eight hours a day.  I needed that you speak a connection, I needed that human connection.  I needed that ability to interact, and I feed off people’s energies.  If people are in a great mood, I’m in a great mood, if people are struggling, I’m empathetic towards that.  I end up in radio production, sorry, I ended up in radio promotions.  So I ended up being a promotions manager.  And from that – was more engaged in setting up events.  Those events I was meeting people, but always had that underlying drive to actually be on air.  Then through different roles ended up doing some fill-in work.  Being what they call station floater so popping up in someone’s away.  Then ended up with my first full-time breakfast gig in Gippsland in 2010 and have pretty much been on-air ever since.

Connecting to My Self

Mark [6:06] Well done.  When you talked to before about connecting to your co-host and you’re telling the stories and people are relating to your stories.  Is that through a connection to yourself that you telling those stories? And how do you connect to yourself?  What’s your process to – how does Stampsy connect with Stampsy and check-in – where she’s at – what’s going on in her well-being and in her life?

Stampsy [6:34] That is something that I’ve only genuinely discovered and started to embrace later in life.  I was not someone who did that early on.  I was very disconnected and it was just not something that was ingrained in me, established or nourished from an early age.  It wasn’t something that I was attuned to. And because I had some underlying mental health issues, it was easier to not deal – than to deal.  So later on, through being more open, being real and being honest, and not only did I work out that by just talking, you realize that there are other people going through the same issues, same struggles.  I managed to do the same embarrassing thing on a date those kinds of things.  You’re not alone in that sense that there are other people – not to say that you’re – not unique.   There are common occurrences as well.

Learning to have Open Dialogue

So by opening the dialogue, I’ve started working out that it’s actually okay to be open and speak.  I think I’m still learning with that being connected to myself.  I don’t think it’s something you can establish overnight and I don’t think it’s a discovery that takes a year – I think it’s ongoing.  I don’t think you can truly work out the answers and truly work at how to connect or find that connection on the daily – after a month of trying, you know, it is an ongoing process.

Mark [8:05] The process from being disconnected to becoming connected, can you share a little bit about that journey?  Has it been an easy journey, a hard journey, an exciting journey, and an interesting journey?

Stampsy [8:18] E. All of the above.

My Journey of Becoming More Self Connected

Stampsy [8:21] It was one that I didn’t necessarily know that I needed or wasn’t a reality until I started going through it. And then I realised just how far removed I was and how much I needed to gain my self- confidence and find my own self-worth through it.  So for me, there probably wasn’t one turning point.  There wasn’t one significant moment in my life where I thought I’m on the wrong path here.  I was just someone who never had and I still don’t know why – have a five-year plan.  Okay, if I roll out this, I will get to this.  I didn’t coast through life.  I’m an exceptionally hard worker almost sometimes to my own detriment.  But I kind of think more week to week.  I think more month to month rather than the long term.  And so when I was living at home, it was about just getting through school.  When I went to school, it was just about getting through the year of study.

Finding My First Love

And then I met my partner on radio and ended up being the support – being the secondary to him.  I never regret my seven and a half years with him.  We towards the end just fell out of love.  And for me, it was probably more that I don’t regret the seven years with him in the seven and a half years because we got to travel the country.  We got to move we got to take on roles on radio.  We got to see amazing parts of the country.  But I think I didn’t prioritize myself and therefore I lost some of myself or because I was so young. Like I got into a relationship when I was 20 years old.  I’d only just moved out of the home.  I had only had a year on campus and then again, I was looking after other youngest students.  I was sort of going about my business, I was studying, working and partying full time seven days a week.  So I didn’t actually stop to think about where I want to go from here.  And then I got into a relationship and somebody else was looking after me again.  He was providing for me and I was nurturing him so I didn’t actually have that time to discover myself and what I wanted.  I didn’t travel until I was 27. Now my bank account shows that I haven’t stopped travelling since.  But for me, it was probably and I actually often reflect about this – when I get to RUOK day?

Finding My Pivot Point

Because this was the turning point for me where I went no, I actually need further help than just crying to my bestie on the phone every so often going what is wrong with me.  I remember sitting in my carport in Warrigal and I’d already moved on with a split from my partner, I’d moved I got this full-time job.  At that point, it was all gone, and then I just remember sitting in the carport going, I don’t know who I am.  Because I had always been a partner.  I had always been in promotions.  I had always had that plus one. I’d always had family around and then I didn’t have any of that.  I literally lost my partner, my job and my house on the Sunshine Coast within two weeks.  So then it was like quick, I’ve got to find a job.  I was going to New Zealand like so I didn’t actually just stop.  And that point was when I had a messy free-fall because I just actually didn’t know what was next because I’d only ever been living week to week.  That’s when I started seeking professional help.  I started opening up more to my friends.  My best friend even said to me back then she goes, and I’ve known I actually caught up with her recently and we were marking almost 31 years of friendship.  I met her in prep, and she said I didn’t really get to know who you were until you move back to Victoria.  She goes, you’ve always been the funny one, but you’ve never really been open and honest.  You’ve always closed yourself off from emotion.  So from then, I feel like I’ve really ramped it up in the last year, to be honest.

Being okay to Connect with my Vulnerability

But just over that time have started discovering that it’s okay to be vulnerable.  It’s okay to be honest when you’re struggling.  Over that time though I have had major dips.  There have been times where I’ve almost lost friends.  I’ve almost lost my job because I’ve lost sight of prioritizing myself first because I’ve almost reverted back to caring for other people or ensuring that everyone else is okay in my space, rather than going I can’t actually control their happiness.

Mark [12:48] That connection is – yeah – when we have a connection, we’ve got connection to the positive, you know, wonderful and we see a lot of that in social media especially for young people are suspect.  Then there’s the other side and we need to learn to connect to it.  Sometimes it can be known as the dark side that – not so pleasant side.  And that’s still connected but the more we connect to it.  Because that side of us has needs, it has emotional needs, mental health needs, and it needs us to connect to it.  And yes, we have to say like someone else to connect to it.  But the more we get in touch with it and connect with it, I wonder whether those parts of ourselves start to one heal and two, start to respond.  We then get more awareness of them and are here I’m going back down that old rabbit hole yet again.  Through this process, how important has a connection to the bestie and others been to you in your journey?

Growing in the Heart of Trust

Stampsy [13:52] I’ve had to have a lot of trust and faith in people.  That’s not to say I didn’t trust the best intentions of people.  But I’ve never trusted people.  And people are reality – going to let you down.  It’s just a way of life.  They might not mean it callously though, they may not do it with ill intention.  I’ve got to stop taking that personally.

Mark [14:22] Taking to heart?

Stampsy [14:23] Taking it to heart, taking it as a reflection of who I am.  Not in where they are in that moment.  And also then turning it around and ensuring that if I’ve let someone down, I’m obviously profusely sorry if it is something that I have done intentionally or unintentionally, but it is caused that effect but to know that the interpretation I can’t have control of.  So that is something I’m still learning but I feel in the last year, I have just leaps and bounds.  Just developed in that sense of I’ve removed the toxicity, I’ve removed the negativity, I’ve removed that mindset of that’s where the brain goes in the first place rather than the last place.  Or at least not even in the last place, just removing that train of thought, from my thinking.  Because it is so easy to want the best for people.  But it is so common that we don’t want to offend people.  We don’t want to insult people.  We want people to think we are the best.  We want people to feel confident in us.  We want people to think that we won’t let them down.  We want to control what other people think of us.

Stampsy [15:39] Because we don’t want to be saying in a negative light.  But the thing is, people can think whatever they want.  It’s not a reflection of who you are.

 My Connection to Others

Mark [15:49] When you’re flowing when everything’s on song – when you connect to others, what do you notice happens?  What do you get back?  When you give out that energy and you’ve got a lot of energy and it flows.  What do you notice happens in that connection to you and others? Does it come alive?

Stampsy [16:11] There’s a success.  I don’t mean that in a financial necessity and I don’t mean that in a promotion sense or anything.  But you just get success – as in you get closer with your friends.  You invite more positivity in your life.  You see things in a brighter light.  You see things – you’re more connected with people and places and thoughts and ideas.  You’re more creative.  I find when I, especially in the role I do – if I’m in a happy space, I’m more creative.  When I’m in negative space – I call it the blanket.  It’s like when the blankets pulled over your head.  You feel like you’re suffocating and you’re concentrating on and exerting energy into something that isn’t going to give you that creative space.  It isn’t going to fill you with a positive breath.

Loving my Social Connections

So when, you’re having that connectivity, and I always thought I was someone that thrived in big social circles.  I’m comfortable, but I thrive one-on-one.  That’s when I truly because I can listen to someone.  I talk for a living, I get paid to talk.  But I love to listen to people, because at the end of the day, which sounds crazy because some of the things that work has made me do.  Other people’s lives are so much more interesting than my own.  And you just learn so much when you listen.  And so, when you have – you connect by acknowledging and letting the person know that I cannot just see you and hear you but I’m listening to you,

Mark [17:46] When you’re connecting to them and listening to them.  Are you listening to them – not just from your head, but also from your heart?

Connection through Deeply Listening

Stampsy [17:53] Both. Yeah, I’m listening, one of my flaws, unfortunately, is I don’t have a very good long term memory.  So I’m trying to connect.  And that’s not an excuse either, I genuinely don’t, I had an accident when I was younger and I swear it affected my long term memory.  But I connect with what they’re saying to physically how they’re looking and that passion.  So if I see them smiling, I know they genuinely happy about that outcome.  But then I’m listening to what it is as well.  I’m absorbing what it is and not just the event, but what led up to it or how it made them feel.

Mark [18:32] And as you’re doing that, are you checking and connecting to yourself and checking in how you’re resonating with it?  What’s happening too in your body?  How you’re responding?  How you’re reacting?

Absorbed in their Moment

Stampsy [18:41] Probably not enough to be honest.  Again, I’m probably so absorbed in making sure that they’re having their moment – they are so happy, they’re excited or they need to vent.  They need to vent their frustration or they need to just express sorrow.  I just want to make sure that they’ve got someone who’s listening to that.  I don’t want any interpretation of judgment because it’s not about me, it’s about them. And I think that is still a connection because it’s giving myself to them to ensure that they’re in a safe space.

Mark [19:17] Yeah, that was the word I was – it sounds like you’re creating a safe space for them to connect to whatever they need to connect to.

What Said to Me Stays With Me

Stampsy [19:23] I often say I’m a vault and I truly am.  If someone tells me something, it stays with me.  I’m not one to talk about others.  I’m not one to think that everybody’s information is my right to share.   If they tell me something, they’re telling me something in strict confidence.  Unless it’s great news, and then I’ll make sure that they have shared it and then I’ll spread about how excited and how much joy I’m feeling for them.

Mark [19:51] And as that vault that would make the connection to others very safe.  They know Stampsy – yeah they’ll always and could they always then come to you.  Because they know you’re safe, you’re loyal and that’s a really strong solid conduit for that connection to others with them.  In moving the conversation to the ‘All That Is’ – when I talk about the ‘All That Is’  and your connection to ‘All That Is’ – what comes up in your mind when I pose that metaphor, the ‘All That Is’?

‘All That Is’ – my Peace & Solitude

Stampsy [20:28] It’s a place of peace.  It’s a place of solitude, but feeling confident and comfortable in that solitude, and that’s probably one area I struggle in.  So I have a very deep fear of death.  I haven’t actually vocalize that often, if at all. So hello, podcast.  It’s not one that drives me.  It probably does underlie. It probably does drive me to do things that some people might find scary.  I M.C (Master of Ceremony), that terrifies people.  How can you stand up in front of thousands of people, hundreds of people you don’t know.  We’ve got a common connection.  We’re here at an event, we’re fundraising.  We are doing our part for the community.  I get to meet this really amazing human being.  I get to chat with them for 10 minutes on stage and that’s probably where I thrive the most.  I get to present.  I get to tell people when breakfast is coming out and where the bathrooms are.  But then I get 10

minutes of questions and answers and in that, I get to chat in a very large space with people but that one on one connection with someone on stage.  That’s my favorite part of the whole thing.

Mark [21:41] Do you treasure that?

Love Being in the Moment with People

Stampsy [21:42] I do.

Mark [21:43] Yeah I could see it.  As you were sharing it – the energy there is you’re sharing it.  Just that moment – just that few moments with that person – it’s a very treasured moment?

Stampsy [21:54] Well that goes back to my favourite times with my friends are those one-on-one. In a small group – there might be three of us.  But just bringing it back and centering it more to a more intimate space.  I

feel most comfortable that’s where – I’m the funniest but also too – I’m my most invested, I’m most vulnerable, I’m my most sincere, most connected to other people.  Because I can just focus my energy. I get – I do, I get exhausted in a massive room.  And in a way that’s like on-air as well.  I get exhausted.  I tell my family not to call me after 7:30 pm because I’ve just invested so much energy talking to thousands of people in an afternoon.  That, I’ve almost used all of me and I need to recharge for the day.

My ‘Disconnect to Reconnect’ Charge

Mark [22:45] Do you then disconnect to recharge.  Disconnect to reconnect?

Stampsy [22:48] Yep, big time.

Mark [22:50] And it sounds like you’re giving it a lot of energy in that connection to others.  You’re giving out a massive amount of energy.  Are you able to check in on how much energy you give out in that connection?

Stampsy [23:05] Usually when I slept through my alarm, I know I’m exhausted.

Stampsy [23:10] I have missed several gym sessions.  And there have been many weekends where I wake up at 11:30 am in the morning, and I’ve gone to bed at nine o’clock the night before.  And that’s when I know I got to take some time out.

Managing Our Bodies Energy Reserves

Mark [23:21] It’s the body letting you know.  My belief is that we have between 83% and 95% energy in our being each day.  Unless we’re Olympic athletes, we might know about 99.9 just to get that 10-second win. And its how do we keep connecting to ourselves, checking in our bodies, checking in physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually to – yeah – just ensure that our connection is there.  Because that energy – as soon as we leave the front door, we’re walking into the digital Bronx. It’s – we put our shields on to protect our self.  When you have that intimacy with those 3 friends – it was sounding like there’s real safety in your vulnerability there with that intimacy.  There’s a different flow of the connection energy around that. With the ‘All That Is’ – when you’re saying you go to the gym.  Sometimes in that ‘All That Is’ – is those ‘Aha moments’ like a beautiful sunset or you’re pushing weight at the gym that you’ve been trying to push, and you get it.  And it’s just that “Aha”.  What’s that connection like to you when you hit that “Aha Moment” in the ‘All That Is’?

My Contentment of Both Sides

Stampsy [24:40] Yeah, it’s contentment.  You can – people strive to be happy.  I just want to be happy, that’s not a constant state.  It’s not feasible because you’ll drain your reserve energy if you try to maintain that happiness.  I always say I’m a realist.  I’m not an optimist.  I’m not negative.  I’m just a realist.  I’m not pessimistic. I way up – might be Gemini ism, we were talking about that earlier.

Stampsy [25:08] But for me, it’s just seeing everything from both sides and weighing it up.  And for me, the “Aha moments”, are just those moments, where I know I’m present, I’m in the space, and it’s so simplest of joys.

My Flow-State Lets Go of Negativity

Mark [25:26] Is there a flow state when you’re there?  It’s just the contentment – Is there a subtle flow-state is just beyond the intellectual mind. The 1 + 1?

Stampsy [25:41] There’s no…

Mark [25:44] The free-flowing energy?

Stampsy [25:47] For me, it’s the loss of holding on to any negativity.  So it’s – not being wind you can feel the shoulders relax, you can see or feel the smile on your face.

Stampsy [26:06] I was just actually thinking, this is why I’m getting a little bit teary.

Deep Love Connection to My Nephews

Stampsy [26:09] Probably some of the key moments of just being around my nephews.  When – because they’ve got such innocence about them.  And it’s just the little things that I do.  So, you know, my youngest nephew, Roman will come running up, he is just – his little Buddha – he’s huge.  He’s taller than his little brother.  But he is just a bundle of love, and he’ll just run up and he’ll just wrap your arms around you.  And that’s where you go everything’s okay.  Or, you know, just even – I go on Aunty days with them.  So they don’t get birthday presents they are spoiled enough.  So they get a day with their Aunty Lee.  And we just spend the whole day.  We’ll just get the car – we’ll go do an activity.  We’ll go have some lunch, and just sitting in the car with them and talking shit pardon my French.  But like some of the things that come out of their mouth.  You can’t even comprehend how they got to that point.  But they just see black and white and just having. That’s why I love kids.  I just connect to kids because it’s just so innocent and it’s just so light-hearted.

Mark [27:10] And how much in a connection to those nephews. Yeah. How much-unabated love is that connection to them?

Their Connection brought me Home

Stampsy [27:19] Well, they were the reason I moved back to Victoria.  So I was living in Hobart at the time.  I remember I was coming back and must have been for my brother’s birthday, but it was around ANZAC Day weekend. And he actually picked me up at the airport.  I got in the back of the car, and my oldest nephew Josh, recognise me because he’s a couple of years older than his brothers.  I got in the car and I said, Hi Josh, and I turned to Cooper I said, I Coop and he balled – had no idea who I was because he only sees me every once every three months.  Ronan was already a baby so he was probably asleep in his capsule and totally unaware of what was going on – and still very much like that – very unaware of what’s going on.  But for that moment, it’s like no I can’t have that in my life.  And so, now I think that’s why I take extra time.  I focus a lot of my decisions on that because it’s those little things that will make the greatest impact.  And that’s the greatest connection you can have that reliability that your Auntie will be there.  So for me, it’s like yeah, they just bring so much joy.

Mark [28:32] And love?

Stampsy [28:33] So much love.

No Words can describe my Nephew’s Love  

Mark [28:35] And when your body is filled with that, love, can you describe the connection?  Probably not in words.

Stampsy [28:45] It’s really hard with words.

Mark [28:46] It is really hard in words, isn’t it?  But it’s there.

Stampsy [28:49] For me, it’s- there’s no judgment.  They just love who you are.  They don’t care what you’ve done.  They don’t care about the mistakes you made.  They don’t care about the run-in you’ve had with people.  They just want to know your there and that’s really cool.

Mark [29:09] Beautiful yeah.  And because they’re there for you – does that then open up your heart for you to connect deeper to you in all that love?

Stampsy [29:22] A lot of my decisions are based on them.

Deepening My Connections

Stampsy [29:24] Would they be proud of me.  Yeah.   I guess some of that has rubbed on to developing my friend – developing my relationship and maintaining that with my friends as well.  Would that be proud of me? Because I want to make sure that I don’t disappoint them.  So yeah, you sort of you do start thinking more about and I guess it’s an age thing as well.  You sort of – as you get in your 30s I’ve started going no, it’s the quality, not quantity.  I think we need younger in your 20s.  I mean, I moved (you alright – you okay?) In my 20s I moved around a lot for radio.  So for me, I’ve got a lot of acquaintances.  I’ve got a lot of friends, but I don’t have deep connections until I moved back.  I’ve been here for five years and I’ve got some of the closest friends I’ve ever made.  So yeah, it helped me in my 30s made me start to decide what do I want, rather than how much of it do I want?  And from that, I then get decided, am I making this decision for the benefit of someone else?  Or am I making the decision for me?  Or am I making the decision for my nephews?

Stampsy [30:43] I think I trailed off then.

Mark [30:45] That’s okay just follow it.  The connection to your nephews and then to the close friends who have made here in Geelong over the past five years.  That connection is really important to your well-being – to our well-being to everybody’s well-being.  The more we have that connection, as one of the things that have come from this podcast is the World Heart of Connection Day – where it’s just taking the one day out for us to connect to ourselves, others and ‘All That Is’.  And part of that ‘All That Is’ is Mother Earth and giving back to Mother Earth.  The power and the energy of your close connections to your nephews, to those close friends here.  If you could magnify that, what impact do you think that would have on Mother Earth?

Connection to ‘All That Is’ ~ More Conscious Decisions

Stampsy [31:39] I think you’d make more conscious decisions.  I think it would ensure that it’s – I call it the fast-food approach – the easy option.  I think you’re more inclined to meal prep.  As you can tell, I haven’t had breakfast yet.

Stampsy [32:01] It’s about making more thoughtful, mindful, conscious decisions.  I know since I moved to Geelong and I’ve often said this, Geelong is more of a home than any other place I’ve lived.  The community has embraced me, it’s invited me, it encouraged me, taught me so much.  And the people that I’ve met here, and I still have an amazingly close group of girlfriends in Melbourne, they are my core, they’re the centre of my friendship group.  But then I’ve got friends here in Geelong who have taught me all these life skills.

Finding Connection to My True Self

Stampsy [32:33] I think and this is where I come back to.  I’m still in a constant state of learning that – I’m still finding that connection, I can talk a lot and I can give a lot of advice if that is what that person is asking of me if they would like my advice or if they just want me to sit there and listen.  But I still think my greatest lesson to be learned is to understand what I want and my true self and my centre.

Stampsy [33:01] But those small steps of connecting with friends and therefore growing that for the benefit of Mother Earth.  It’s just about being mindful, but it’s about being conscious.  It’s about just being honest, cuz you might think that they – the other – you might think that the other person will be offended by it.  But that comes back to that’s their interpretation.  If you’re honest, you’ll never live a life of a lie.

Mark [33:39] In drawing the podcast to a close is there – just as you’re sharing just then, as you’re sharing what you’re just sharing – I was proposing the next question in my mind about advice to younger people.  What you’ve just shared – yeah, that was – from where I was coming. That was beautiful advice for young people but that’s me putting my interpretation on it.  If you were to give advice to young people coming through their journey now, from what you’ve learned thus far in your journey, what advice would that be for young people coming through now?

It is OK to Ask for Professional Help

Stampsy [34:22] The one thing I wish I had of invested more time in, got more support in, is my mental health.  I was – I’m diagnosed clinically depressed at age 27.  But my psychologist thinks it may go all the way back to when I was 14.  That inhibited so much of my growth and development and how I connected with others. How I thought of myself, my own self-worth.  And also how I probably masked that with either extreme happiness or extreme anger to detract from how I was genuinely feeling.  So I think not seeing it as a sign of weakness, just seeing it as a sign of struggling.  And I think we live in a digital age world where it’s so much harder in so many ways.  Because you fear – what will be out there, it will actually be out there for a lifetime.  But also too, you have to deal with that for a lifetime internally. So being really open to being honest with yourself and if you’re not right, you’re not alright.

Mark [35:42] And reach out to connect to others to get some help and support for that part of us that’s not okay that that part of us is sensitive and vulnerable and it’s not coping?

Connecting to my Self-Development

Stampsy [35:52] Seeking people who are trained, medical professionals.  Finding solace in a family member now doesn’t have to be directly a Mum or Dad.  It could be your Auntie, it could be a cousin.  Just someone and then having a really great close friendship circle.  My friends in Melbourne who I said before – they’re a judgment free zone.  They have weathered the storm we all have.  But we’ve weathered the storm through so much, and they still stand by me today.  I’ve lost friendships over who I am.  But that came back to – that was a lesson that grew me and developed into the person I am today.  That I can still trust people, the right people to trust will remain in my life.  And that’s probably the other lesson too.  It’s not your mission.  You don’t need to strive to keep everybody happy.  Sometimes the wrong people disappear to make your life better.  Don’t think you’ve got to hold on to them because I held on to some very wrong people for a very long time.  People will come and go, that is just a part of life.  So ensure that you don’t take that personally. That is opening up your life to invite the right people into your life.  Because I feel like that right now I probably have the greatest group of people friends around me that I’ve ever had.

Mark [37:17] Thank you.  Lee thank you so much for opening your heart and connecting from your heart today in this lovely podcast.  To – this beautiful to sit here and share both the highs and the joys and there are no lows.  It’s just that – it’s a roller coaster.  The roller coaster of life you don’t want to put it in the relative positive or negative.  It’s just the roller coaster.  You know, we go way up we go up and down and round and round and it really is.  Thank you for your honesty and thank you for your authenticity and sharing of vulnerability.  I think it’s a really positive sign for young people to observe and notice and to take notice that we are – we do have a vulnerability.

Stampsy [38:06] Especially in this industry that every day I come in, I switch those microphones on and you don’t want to.  You switch the microphone – you switch the radio on because you want to disconnect for a bit. You want to laugh, you want to listen to your favourite music.  Sometimes behind the mic, there is a lot more going on not every day is happy.  And, you know, I don’t want to use this as something to dwell on.  It’s not something that I want people to feel sorry for me for it’s certainly not that.  But, there’s a human side to all humanity and that’s it.  It’s not all rainbows and butterflies.  There are genuine struggles but that is the contentment and joy of just getting through life.

Mark [38:49] Well done. Thank you so much for this opportunity.

Stampsy [38:52] Thanks, Mark.

Mark [38:52] Namaste.

 

Transcribed by https://otter.ai